Tuesday, 13 February 2018

I am just lucky to have you as mine.
Just with that, I won't ask for more.
I was never looking for someone perfect.
But you are a perfect match to me dear boy.
Thanks for everything.

Saturday, 30 December 2017


Ramai orang salah faham pasal istikarah
Lebih ramai orang yang menggunakan dan menunggang agama semata-mata dan menjadikan istikarah sebagai satu alasan untuk menghalalkan perbuatan mereka yang tak sepatutnya

Ramai orang perlu faham
Bila istikarah masa tu hati dan perasaan neutral
Tak ada bias atau pun perasaan yang memberat ke arah yang dipilih oleh hati dan diri sendiri
Sebab in the end,
Kau cuma mengikut hati dan perasaan 
dan sebenarnya itu dah langsung tak ada kaitan dengan istikarah
waktu tu istikarah cumalah satu alasan ataupun excuse yang dibuat-buat

Tapi masih ramai yang buat macam ni
Dan akhirnya mempergunakan perkataan istikarah tu demi kepentingan sendiri
Berhentilah mempergunakan agama sedemikian rupa

Tidak salah untuk membuat keputusan yang terbaik untuk diri sendiri
Cuma, janganlah gunakan agama dengan cara macam tu

That is not how it should works.

Sunday, 17 December 2017

Gender Equility

So I just come across this stupid statement on twitter
Whoever tweet this are definitely still living in the ancient times.
No doubt about that.

such statement irk the hell out of me.
why do you expect when going out for a date, mesti lelaki nak kena bayar semua.
the way i see it.. 
that is not considered as manner or 'just trying to be a gentleman'
this is 2017
stop looking down on girls please..
let us do it too sometimes

2017, perempuan dah dapat buat most of the thing yang lelaki boleh buat
You want to talk about pride? or maruah?
So you expect only boys should be paying when going on a date because perempuan ni takde pride and maruah?
Is that is how it is?


In a relationship, ada tolak ansur.
Semua kena divide lah
Ada time laki bayar ada time perempuan yang bayar
Serius aku rasa tak sweet langsung if lelaki kena tanggung semua. EVERYTIME
For me, I'll see the man as someone who looks down of girls because he thinks that girls can't do it
While the girl, if she expects the guy to pay for her every single time. She deserve a golden shovel so it is even easier for her to dig the gold (in a simple way of saying -- Gold Digger)

This is 2017 kot
Gender equality applies
Girls, jangan bebankan lelaki sangat, don't put all the burden on their shoulder, jangan tahu nak kikis duit je sampai nak kawin pun harapkan lelaki je sediakan semua
Guys, kadang-kadang ajar jugak your girls to be independent and tak manja sangat or they'll end up as a sendu, lembik, weak girl in the future...

Just my rant.

Saturday, 28 October 2017

Have you ever in your life
You achieve something big but you think it comes to you way easily
And now you doubt it
You feel like there's something wrong with this
It shouldn't be this easy
It can't be this easy

That's exactly what I feel now

Yeah, I am an ambitious girl
Living in a world full of competitive people

Honestly not to brag
I achieve big things in life without needing to go through some kind of struggle and hardship to achieve something
And now that I think of it
I feel there's something off about that

Like, you know the feeling when you think the situation is not right

I often heard people told me that I worked hard but refuse to acknowledge my own efforts
but me, myself...
I don't think so
I don't think I had worked hard enough to come to the place I am right now
That's why I'm thinking why it is too easy

I often heard people say I am good at something thus making me successfully achieve something
But hearing that just make me feeling embarrassed to myself as I know that I am actually lacking a lot

I know this is called Rezeki
I am really grateful to what I have achieved until this moment
But I know I could do better


Few weeks ago
I was offered a job right under the Senior Manager in a big company by the Sr Mgr himself 
(I'm not going to mention the name but it have something to do with Water in KL & Selangor)
Since I am working with this one project right now which is under him
And I am the one who manage this project
The Senior Manager itself offer me to just continue in what I am doing
And be right under him

He was saying that he will resign after this project end
Which will make me rise up to his current position as a Senior Manager as soon as he did that
I really think I don't deserve that just yet
There's still a lot for me to learn

He also told me that there's a possibility that if I take that job people will hate me 
Because I will be the youngest person ever to be in that position
Plus I am a girl no scratch that woman to be exact
Honestly That is not what my concern is

I just know I didn't deserve this offer
There's still a lot of things that I am lacking with
Still a lot I need to learn 

People says I'm letting go such a golden opportunity
But I think it hurts my pride and I am blocking other's opportunity by accepting the job
The job I mentioned takes at least 15 years of experience to be an expert
But I only involves in this project just about a month
I am just a bud
They say they see potential
I know but that place was too high for me
I want to but deep in my heart I just know this is not my time yet

I want to be there
I really do
But I think I need to sharpen my swords first
before blatantly jump into a position that wasn't reserved for me
I wan't to claim that place with pride and dignity
Proudly the moment I know I deserve it
But it is not now I know
Sooner or later I'll be there
And people will acknowledge me as the 'one'
And that is my moment

I always wonder
If the people who got into a position because of  having some "cable" or an insider in a company
when they actually doesn't meet the requirement for the position
I know deep inside their heart the must feel a sense of  guilt and ashamed of themselves
For claiming something that initially wasn't meant for them
I think that is how I feel if I ever accept something I don't deserve
And it will hurt me for a long time... Mentally.

Friday, 29 September 2017

Wednesday, 27 September 2017

Hai awak,
Sebelum nak justify your lie and your pretentious side
Please work out on your English first

It is bad enough that your were trying to rub that lies into my face
Pretending that you were innocent
(When the world obviously know that you were not)
I thought you are a corporate-level worker,
Now how could you even flunk with that simple English

You don't need to add 's' in a noun when it is singular form
Using article a shouldn't be followed by nouns with -s
Urgh FFS

Honestly, if other people do this I don't care at all
The truth is I never care at all
We all have our learning phases
And me myself aren't even good at it

But because you always rub your nose in my business
That kinda irk the hell out of me.

Young Queen, Young Bo$$
That's what I am

Saturday, 23 September 2017


I don't like my mind right now
Stacking up problems that are so unnecessary
Wish that I could slow things down
I wanna let go but there's comfort in the panic
And I drive myself crazy
Thinking everything's about me
Yeah I drive myself crazy
'Cause I can't escape the gravity

I'm holding on
Why is everything so heavy?
Holding on
To so much more than I can carry
I keep dragging around what's bringing me down
If I just let go, I'd be set free
Holding on

Why is everything so heavy?
You say that I'm paranoid
But I'm pretty sure the world is out to get me
It's not like I make the choice
To let my mind stay so fucking messy
I know I'm not the center of the universe
But you keep spinning round me just the same
I know I'm not the center of the universe
But you keep spinning round me just the same

I'm holding on
Why is everything so heavy?
Holding on
To so much more than I can carry
I keep dragging around what's bringing me down
If I just let go, I'd be set free
Holding on
Why is everything so heavy?

I know I'm not the center of the universe
But you keep spinning round me just the same

I know I'm not the center of the universe
But you keep spinning round me just the same
And I drive myself crazy
Thinking everything's about me

I'm holding on
Why is everything so heavy?
Holding on

To so much more than I can carry
I keep dragging around what's bringing me down
If I just let go, I'd be set free
Holding on
Why is everything so heavy?

Why is everything so heavy?

Why is everything so heavy?

- Linkin Park, Kiiara

Friday, 22 September 2017

After 4 days demam malam
Harini baru rasa nak pergi check kat klinik
Bukan ape
Sebab takut ada denggi je
Kawasan aku duduk sekarang ni dah lah memang hospot untuk denggi huks

Pulak tu haritu batuk berdarah
Haa just in case pergilah check weh

So tadi dia amik sample darah
Sebab nak check kot denggi
Ada dua nurse
Sorang mungkin trainee, sorang lagi memang nurse yang dah lama kot
Kena time aku nak amik sample darah tu dapat la kat nurse trainee tu

First, dia cari vein aku tak jumpa
Pastu second aku tanya "sakit tak?"
Biasanya mesti nurse akan cakap "tak sakit pun, rasa cam gigit semut je."
Nurse ni boleh bantai jawab "Sakit, amik darah kan" senyum senyum
Stress aku
Tapi aku pun gatal pergi tanya
Padan muka aku

Dah la memang takut jarum takut darah semua weh
Pastu aku buat tough je la
Buat-buat berani
Malu lah kan nak tunjuk takut dekat orang kan

Tengah-tengah trainee nurse tu nak amik darah aku
Dengar nurse lagi sorang tu tegur kat nurse trainee tu
"Jangan tolak-tolak, kalau tak boleh masuk angkat sikit"
Seram bhai
Kau cucuk ape doh kat lengan aku 

Dah la dia cucuk dalam sikit huks
Tengah-tengah dia amik darah tu boleh pulak dia tukar orang
sebab nurse trainee tu tak reti
Bapak lahh

Lepas amik darah tu weh aku takleh bangun kot
Nak pitam
Dia ni amik darah or sedut darah

After this and that kena masuk balik bilik dr tadi
Dia kata ok semua
Tapi kalau teruk pergi check lagi sekali

Pastu gi kaunter amik ubat
RM100++ weh
OMG nasib baik ada cash
Dah la akhir bulan ni tak masuk lagi gaji noks

Makin sakit lepas dengar dia charge 
Speechless sat aku

Balik rumah jadi makin tak larat nak compare dengan time pergi tadi
Kalau tahu camni baik aku tunggu baik sendiri je.
Melayang RM 100.

Thursday, 21 September 2017

He Deserves Better Than You

You left him
for the reason;
He deserves better than you
When you completely know
It was just a lame excuse
The world already know
You had eyed another gold mine before your declaration
Hence, the reason of your shift of heart

You left him with the reason;
He deserves better than you
And then he meets me
I just realized maybe you were right after all

He deserves better than you.
He deserves me

And I am always better than you.

This Blog is Owned by Izzati Farhah Aziz - Est. 2011©